When Disappointment Really Means You're Still in The Game; Still Reaching
I knew the decision before I even opened the email, and I suspected it wasn’t going to be what I wanted to hear. The give-aways:
The time the email landed in my inbox (10:37 pm). For as long as I’ve been working with law firms, I’ve only ever received emails at that hour from clients…never prospects.
The preview that I could see from my phone, “Thank you for your thoughtful follow-up and for the energy you brought to our conversation…”
Yeah, this speaking gig probably wasn’t going to happen. But it was 11pm; I was getting into bed and I wasn’t ready to open the email. So, I didn’t.
In fact, I didn’t open it until after my workout the next morning.
And sure enough, what I “felt” in my gut the night before was confirmed, with this: “After careful consideration, we have decided to move in a different direction for this opportunity.”
Look, I know that in reality I have three jobs/roles in my business: professional speaker - business/finance coach - salesperson. That last role is what drives my ability to get booked for speaking gigs and to get hired as someone’s coach.
And, I hear “no” A LOT!
But, They Are Not All the Same
Yet, this “no” hit differently—I took it hard. I was disappointed; I felt sad.
Not because I didn’t know this was a possibility—maybe even a probability. And not because I don’t know how to navigate rejection. I do.
But sometimes a “no” brushes up against the part of you that was already tender.
In this case, I was already wondering how I “did” during the discovery call. Plus, I was especially excited—it was a firm that’s been on my target list for a while, and they reached out to me based on a referral! So, I allowed myself to feel extra hopeful of what their “yes” might have made possible in 2025 and beyond.
In business, there’s a constant tug-of-war between hope and outcome. You put yourself out there, have the meeting, follow up, follow through.
And in between all of that is the vulnerable act of wanting.
Money is tangled in this, too.
It’s not just the potential revenue I won’t be receiving. It’s the value I knew I could bring, the impact I imagined making, the trust I hoped to build—and the reality that none of those things will materialize this time around.
Disappointment is one of those things that touches all three: money, business, and life.
In money, it shows up as the deal that didn’t close, the budget that didn’t stretch, the dream you deferred—again.
In business, it’s the prospect who went in another direction, the client who didn’t renew, the opportunity that passed you by, the pitch that didn’t land.
In life, it’s the quiet ache of having to regroup after a personal setback.
When did you last experience a disappointment that stopped you in your tracks?
How did you initially respond? What did you do to care for yourself while you sat in your disappointment? I’d be honored to witness your story.
Stay in the Game
One of the things I’m proud of myself for doing is this: I didn’t try to “rush” through my feelings.
I owned my sadness. When people asked how I was, I simply responded with, “I’m just okay today.”
Yes, it still stings (and yes, I’m wondering who was selected - 🤔), but here’s what’s become clearer to me over the last two days: disappointment only stings this much when you care.
And that caring? That’s not a weakness. It’s proof of your engagement with your work, your mission, your aspirations.
So yes, I was disappointed.
But, I’m also proud that I let myself care enough to be.
I’m proud that I didn’t try to bypass my feelings and that I practiced extra self-care as I “sat” with those feelings.
And I’m proud of writing a very gracious reply that invited them to reconnect with this sentence: “If your direction shifts in the future and you see a space where my perspective on money, business, and life might be a good fit, I'd be delighted to reconnect.”
In a world filled with uncertainty, disappointment is inevitable.
Sometimes we are disappointed with ourselves, with other people, with the outcome/results we experience. So, if it’s knocking at your door right now, you’re not alone. (And, I’m sorry.)
But remember: you most certainly get to choose how you navigate those disappointments.
Let your next (or current) disappointment remind you that you’re still in the game, still reaching for what’s possible, still invested. That’s something to honor.
About Jacquette
I love to ask questions and spark aha moments. I love to talk about why success with money is about more than just the numbers, and how the cultural impact on the intersection of money, business, and life matters–A LOT! And, I really hope I help people feel seen, heard, and not judged—especially since money is emotional and personal.
