The first thing I do when I get a request for a TV appearance is jot down three to five talking points; the second thing I do is think about what I am going to wear. The latter isn’t as girly or superficial as it seems. What we wear is, after all, part of our communication strategy.
And from my dear friend, Sharon, who is a celebrity stylist, I have learned that what looks good to the naked-eye doesn’t always translate well onscreen – especially with HDtv! Her point: Use your attire to let your personality shine, but not at the expense of your message, mission, and movement.
Channeling Sting & The Police
As I prepare for any speaking engagement, especially one that will be captured on film, I hear Sharon’s “voice” in my head saying things like “remember the colors that I told you look good on-air; avoid distracting patterns; what have you worn on-air recently; be mindful of the dress or skirt length especially if you are sitting down,” etc. I call her voice my “fashion director.”
But I hear other “voices” throughout my day, as well, whether I’m doing a TV appearance, writing, coaching a client, conducting a training seminar, or hanging with my family and friends. These “voices” just didn’t have names until two weeks ago.
I had the awesome pleasure and privilege of being both a speaker and onsite coach at Alexia Vernon’s inaugural Moxie Camp a few weeks ago. One of the many benefits of the weekend was sitting in on the other speakers’ sessions, such as the fabulous Jenny Blake’s. She had us do an exercise from her Make Sh*t Happen program where we focused on identifying our fears and barriers – the ones that show up as “people” in our head when we make big, audacious goals. (Awesome question, right?)
For maximum effect, I am sure, Jenny gave us a few short minutes for this exercise. And below is what I wrote without any deliberation — these are taken from my notes, in the order written:
- Fashion Director
- Creative Director
- Communication Director
- Representation Director
- Legacy Director
Lest you think I am losing my bearings, I bet you have your internal, invisible voices, too. C’mon…admit it -;o) While you are it, why not take a moment to list/label your voices.
After asking us to recognize the “people” (aka voices) in our heads, Jenny then asked us to think about the ways in which our voices amplify our fears as we work toward fulfilling our dreams and goals. And then she said…
…what do you want to say to them… (Damn, that’s powerful!)
What became crystal clear from Jenny’s exercise is that our invisible voices always have something to say. At times, the words are encouraging; at other times, they hinder our progress and growth. With that in mind, I said to mine: Protect me, but don’t block me. (Hmm…I think that is a tweetable – click here to share.)
So tell me, what would you say to your voices? Leave a comment to share both what you’d tell your “people” as well as the labels you’ve given your peeps.
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Love this post! Kept me intrigued right to the end! Yes, I have a “little girl” in me that tries to protect me too much. I really love your thought “protect me but don’t block me.”
Thank you, Bonnie!
“Protect me but don’t block me”. Why it’s hard to follow up with something good after that great talking point!!
Personally I think the wisdom in your post is captured in the fact of acknowledging that we do have voices. And to listen to them. I would say that many of us are not willing to admit that we have voices – both good and bad – in our head and even fewer of us listen to what they have to say.
And I’m betting they influence alot more in life than we realize.
So for this week, I’m taking some time to listen consciously to what they have to say.
Thanks for the inspiration!
Malla, I love, Love, LOVE that you are planning to take time to consciously “listen.” I think that is so important and so necessary in a world that is filled with distractions. I know I could use a bit more discipline in my practice of silence and being still so I can hear and discern. So, thank YOU for the inspiration to focus on that this coming week.
Jacquette — I love your reflection on this exercise — it’s so powerful! There’s something fun about laying our “committee” out on the table and realizing that they all have their own distinct personalities (now I’m starting to sound a little crazy, I’m sure). I love that you were willing to share yours with the group, and the “Protect me but don’t block me” message was SO powerful. We should all take that message with us! You are a bright, shining star in the world and I am thrilled to have met you 😀
So so love this. I always hear these “voices” but I never had a deeper reflection on them until I came upon your post. Now I am really considering coming up with a list such as the one you made, that way, I can distinguish the voices, and have them guide me, especially when I would be interacting with other people.
Those small voices we often hear from within us not just influence us in daily decision making but as well as they reflect our own self . They are our critics at the same mentors.
Avoid distracting patterns is ace fashion advice, especially when you’re going to be on television. I’m definitely going to be attempting to listen to my own silent voices a little more but I might have to train them a little first. 😛 Very inspirational work here, Jacquette! x
Thank you for the sharing. It is very important for me. It is really a great post. I hope you will always update the new post.
Now I am really considering coming up with a list such as the one you made, that way, I can distinguish the voices, and have them guide me